Grace Michaelson

Open Hands & Open Heart

Apr
13

My husband is at this very moment going off to Lullaby Land under the Sioux Falls Specialty Hospital Anesthesiology Team’s capable hands.  While we were waiting in the tiny pre-op room they housed us in before Michael’s surgery, it became very apparent who was nervous about the surgery- and it wasn’t my husband.  He should have been the one who was scared, having never been under a knife, or under anesthesia, in his whole life, but it was me that was a nervous wreck!  I supposed I could pull the Anxiety Disorder Card as an excuse and chalk it up as that as to why I’m so nervous.

I think it’s the fact that he and I have swapped places for the first time in our 19 almost 20 years of marriage and it is uncomfortable to both of us.  He is so used to being the one out here in the waiting room waiting for the surgeon to come out and give him the report, and I’m so used to being the one going off to Lullaby Land.  After 8 surgeries with that being the case, Michael and I have just learned how to dance our parts, so to speak.  Now the rhythm of the dance has changed, and this girl feels like she’s got two left feet.

The Strong One is now one, the one that never shows any weakness, can’t even lean down and pick up a sock without major pain.  So it is time to go in and fix that shoulder.  After 12 years of refusing to pay the piper, he’s got to give in to weakness, and Kari has to play the Caregiver’s part and dig deep and be the strong one.  Can she do it?  Of course she can.  Is she a nervous wreck?  Of course she is.  The person that has been by her side unwaveringly for 19 years is laying on the surgery table right now for the first time.  So, yeah, I’m a little nervous.

Yet, I have a secret that helps me dig deep and draw on a Strength that enables me to be there for my wonderful strong husband during this time when he needs me most.  The strength of Our Father in Heaven.

Psalm 105:4-5a, “Search for the Lord and for His strength; continually seek Him.  Remember the wonders He has performed, His miracles, and the rulings He has given, you children of His servants.”

Psalm 31: 14, “But I am trusting you, O Lord, saying, ‘You are my God!’  My (my husband’s) future is in your hands!”

Psalm 118:21, “I thank You for answering my prayer and giving me victory!”

Philippians 4:4, “Always be full of joy in the Lord.  I say again- Rejoice!  Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything.  Tell God what you need, and thank Him for all He has done.  Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand.”

Well, well, look at the time.  Just talked to the Doc and all is well.  Michael’s shoulder is all fixed and he’ll be in less pain now that he was before the procedure.  What was I worried about again? Haha.